Be good to yourself
Whatever you are struggling with right now and no matter how things unfold – it might not be according to your wishes.
But there is one thing that can help us get through tough moments and even find liberation in them – self-kindness.
Self-kindness used to be a boring topic for me. I’ve never took it seriously and every time someone would tell me to treat myself nicely as I was dealing with bouts of insomnia I would go like “yada yada, I need some real tangible advice, not this!” Until I felt completely stuck on my journey and had to look somewhere where I haven’t really looked before.
So I’m gonna speak today about self-kindness from the perspective of insomnia recovery journey but it’s pretty much applicable to other areas of life.
We underestimate the power of critical self-talk during insomnia. We also often fail to see that talk for what it really is – just a bunch of thoughts with an agenda to keep us chasing sleep, but we treat it as if it was true. We believe it because it always seems to push the right buttons and feels very personal. And we put immense pressure on ourselves just by forgetting to be kind.
At some point, the lack of self-kindness can become the last hurdle on the way to freedom.
But in hope to make someone’s journey a bit easier, I’ll try to give some pointers/reminders about what it means to be kind to yourself.
If the night was rough and you couldn’t “make“ sleep happen – be good to yourself.
If you couldn’t stop thinking about sleep whole day – be good to yourself.
If you gave in to sleep efforts – be good to yourself.
If you felt calm and hopeful in the evening but sleep didn’t come – be good to yourself.
If your thoughts spiralled down to the panic mode – be good to yourself.
If you couldn’t accept the situation – be good to yourself.
If you felt fatigued and defeated in the morning – be good to yourself.
If you got stuck in a yo yo pattern – be good to yourself.
If someone said something or something happened and it triggered you – be good to yourself.
If your sleep on the trip wasn’t great – be good to yourself.
If you can’t stay productive or push through the day – be good to yourself.
If you can’t be good to yourself – be good to yourself about that too.
I hope you get the gist. Kindness isn’t about changing our emotions, thoughts or experiences but about removing extra pressure and forgiving ourselves for things that aren’t available to us in the moment. Kindness isn’t the mean to end insomnia but a facilitator of the acceptance that leads to the end of the struggle.
Take care <3
Alina
DISCLAIMER: Not medical advice. Everything in this newsletter represents personal opinion and experience and is provided for informational purposes only. The author is not a medical doctor, psychotherapist or any other licensed professional. Any information provided by the author does not constitute and/or substitute medical, psychotherapy, counselling or any other professional advice and treatment. It is not intended to treat, cure, diagnose any medical or psychological condition or disorder. Always seek professional licensed help if you have any health concerns.