Breaking free from the urge to check the time at night
When I first started struggling with insomnia, my brain went into full-on sleep performance mode. I kept calculating how much I slept, how much time I had left, how much time was “wasted” lying awake. I even kept a notebook to track my sleep hours, convinced that if I just knew the numbers, I’d somehow have more control over my sleep.
One of the biggest habits that came with this was time-checking. Every time I woke up in the middle of the night, I had to check the time. It felt like I needed proof that my night was going okay. And sure, if I saw a “good” number, I’d feel a little better. But if I didn’t – frustration, panic, and dread would take over.
At first, I thought this habit was helping me. It felt reassuring – until I realized it was actually doing the opposite. Checking the time didn’t fix anything. It only made me more aware of how much I was struggling and put sleep on a pedestal. Funny enough, I had never needed to check the time like this before insomnia. It was something my brain picked up as a way to feel safe, but in reality, it was keeping me stuck.
When I first heard of the timeless principle, I was intrigued. It was the complete opposite of what mainstream CBTi advice teaches (anyone who’s familiar with sleep diaries and efficiency scores knows what I’m talking about). What if I didn’t check the time? What if I just let the night be what it was? At the same time, the idea of not tracking my sleep felt scary – how would I know if I was doing better or worse?
Despite the doubts, I started experimenting with letting go of time-checking. It wasn’t smooth at first – I’d slip back into my old habit once in a while and check my phone every 30 minutes. But over time, I noticed that not knowing actually made things lighter. It took some of the pressure off, and sleep slowly stopped feeling like something I needed to manage.
I see a similar resistance in people I coach, and I truly understand how hard it is to let go of this habit. That’s why I don’t believe in strict, rigid rules. Letting go of time-checking doesn’t mean you should never see the time at night. If you casually glance at it while watching TV or using your phone, that’s totally fine. What matters is why you’re checking. If it’s coming from fear or a need for control, it tends to feed the struggle. But if it happens naturally as part of embracing wakefulness, it’s no big deal.
And if you still find yourself checking time at night, don’t be hard on yourself – that’s okay too. Each person gets to decide what’s helpful and what feels unnecessary. But if you’ve noticed this habit in yourself, maybe take a moment to ask yourself: Is this actually helping me feel more at ease, or is it adding pressure? When we clearly see all the pros and cons of our habits, it becomes easier to make a choice that supports us.
Cheers,
Alina
Hi alina. I dont usually check the time or even i woke up 3x a night. The only issue i have when i cant sleep that urge me ro check the time. And when i see its late? My brain gets anxious maybe ill just accpet i cant control time and emotion play a major role in this moment. Or ill just accept it and be friends with it aswell?
This hit home. I used to check the time constantly, thinking it would give me some sense of control over my sleep. But all it did was add pressure—like I was grading myself every night. Letting go of that habit was tough at first, but over time, I realized not knowing actually made things easier. Sleep stopped feeling like something I had to manage.
That line—“What matters is why you’re checking.”—really stuck with me. If it’s about fear and control, it just feeds the struggle. If it happens naturally, it’s no big deal. That shift in mindset made all the difference for me.