Why do I always go for the worst-case scenario?
Hello friend! I hope you’re doing well ❤️
Here’s something from my recent coaching notes and I hope you’ll find it helpful.
It’s no surprise that a person struggling with insomnia tends to think negatively and catastrophically. Sleep has been placed on such a high pedestal – in the media, in commercials, through “common wisdom”, etc. – that it can feel like it’s game over if we don’t sleep well.
People often find themselves dwelling on worst-case scenarios, and a common question they ask is “why does my brain keep showing me all these horrible images?”
Here’s how I see it:
Anxiety and fear are designed to be uncomfortable experiences – and from a survival perspective, that makes a lot of sense.
Imagine a caveman walking through the woods thousands of years ago when he hears a crackling noise nearby. If his survival instinct told him, “You’re safe, it’s just a bunny. No need to worry,” when there’s actually a predator nearby, that calm reaction could cost him his life.
But if his survival center sends him alarming signals, warning him of the worst-case scenario (“Be careful! This can be a bear!”), he can quickly mobilize his body to run or fight. By being in this alert state, he has a better chance of surviving.
This is why, as humans, we tend to react more pessimistically to uncertainty than optimistically.
If a caveman assumes the best and is wrong, that optimism could lead to trouble. But if he assumes the worst and is wrong, it’s just a false alarm – and he gets to live. This survival mechanism, though uncomfortable, has protected humans for thousands of years.
Even though times have changed and we are much safer now than our ancestors were back then, our brains haven’t evolved much. They still use the same mechanisms to keep us safe.
We don’t have to be afraid of our own brain and the signals it sends, but we also don’t have to believe every thought that arises.
Our brains aren’t always accurate in assessing a situation (perhaps, most of the time!), but they aren’t doing it out of spite. They are simply doing what they are wired to do when they perceive a threat: sending signals that grab our attention and mobilize resources for our survival. And since scary thoughts are more likely to capture our focus than pleasant ones, the brain naturally leans toward showing us worst-case scenarios – it knows that this trick will work on us!
How can knowing all this help? I believe, recognizing catastrophic thoughts for what they truly are allows us to create some distance between ourselves and the thoughts, rather than getting caught up in the rabbit hole of engaging with them. This prevents us from becoming entangled in the content of our thoughts, which often leads to a tiring and unproductive cycle.
Hope this letter was helpful ❤️
See you next time!
Alina