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Michelle's avatar

Looking back on my two-year journey, I see this slow evolution in my ability to embrace acceptance as well. I was highly resistant to it at first. However, a trick that made acceptance more accessible was re-framing it as "tolerating" or "allowing." Because "acceptance" has a slight connotation, we must enjoy it, and the thing we are accepting will be permanent as well. So lowering the bar to "Can I tolerate this?" or "Can I allow it right now," was helpful. It meant I could be frustrated and not like it while simultaneously allowing it to be present. Even now, I find that subtle shift helpful when I have an occasional bad night. Thanks, Alina!

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Fearless Sleep | Alina's avatar

That's a great insight Michelle! 🙌

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Neal Thornton's avatar

Yes, thats my experience too Michelle - trying to force acceptance doesnt work but allowing can be ok. Nevertheless, nice iin depth break-down Alina, thanks

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Fearless Sleep | Alina's avatar

Thank you Neal 😊

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Sacred Sleep Coach- Aly's avatar

💯 agree! So well explained Alina! This is so helpful, informative and comforting!

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Fearless Sleep | Alina's avatar

Thanks Aly 😘

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Ricco's avatar

Hi Coach Alina,

I'm curious what is the difference in choosing to befriend/accept wakefulness as described here vs someone struggling with insomnia without this education for a very long time that would have undoubtedly a lot of exposure to wakefulness anyways, but never managing to get out of the loop?

Would the brain eventually not catch on after years and years of such exposure that there is no real harm even though there was no intent to befriend it?

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Jim Weideman's avatar

I feel I have been in a calm, fairly peaceful state during wakefulness, and accepting of my situation for over several months now, but honestly I cannot see any improvement in sleepless nights which are many more than sleepful ones. I understand this thought may be the ONE that is keeping the insomn\ia going, but at least it would be nice to notice some improvement. Heck, since this started about 8-9, months ago i probably am averaging 2 hrs of sleep per nt.

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