Experiencing insomnia oftentimes feels like you are stuck in the loop. We already know that nobody can control sleep, that sleeplessness can’t harm us and we try so hard to let go of control to finally break that vicious cycle…with no luck. It just seems like nothing works, even letting things go and accepting.
But sometimes when you are in the middle of that storm it is hard to see that all of those desires and intentions to break the cycle are actually what keeps that cycle going.
Here, even simple awareness can be a tremendous help. Every time you find yourself in the problem-solving mode, your thoughts seem to overcrowd your mind, you keep looking for THE ONE thing to make you feel better – just stop for the moment and ask yourself “Am I trying to break the cycle?”. In this moment you start seeing a clearer picture, you are no longer in the storm, you are just observing the storm. Once you really disengage yourself from that automatic process, it will start fading. You no longer feed it, you see it for what it really is. Desire to control drops, expectations drop, resistance drops, anxiety drops… and then you might even feel like just going to bed and simply lie down there, resting. That’s is a really great place for magic to happen 🙂
Cheers,
Ali
A great succinct reminder! Thank you for all of your letters. They have been a huge help when I am "in" the cycle and getting lost in what to do and what is happening. It can be so confusing at times. But of course, trying to "figure out what to do" is the cycle... :)