I feel like I'm on the verge of getting over insomnia, but I can't seem to make regular sleep happen. I'll have a few normal sleep nights in a row then a night like last night, where I go to bed feeling pretty tired (around 11:15pm). But I'm awake until who-knows-when, struggling between tossing and turning and listening to a podcast to bide my time.
At some point last night I finally fell asleep, but I have no idea when that was since I took off my watch to keep from looking at it every hour.
I'm getting to the point where I wonder if it'd be best to NOT continue looking for the same validation and same ideas on letting sleep happen from all you awesome sleep coaches. Maybe I'm stuck in this never-ending insomnia cycle because I continue to read about letting sleep happen on its own--like my brain is on high alert since I'm still reading up on sleep.
Should I simply continue doing what I'm doing? Go to bed each night with no expectations on sleep. And if bad nights happen, let them go and continue on the same track? I'm not sure what else to do.
Hi! I think the answer to the current place of being stuck is here: "I can't seem to make regular sleep happen" - that looks like an attempt to control sleep. Regular sleep is another way the brain wants a "perfect" sleep. We can't make it. It comes when we are okay even with "irregular" sleep.
And definitely, sometimes there can be information overload and if you feel like you need a break from the "sleep world" I think that could do some good! But remember: watching videos or not watching it - isn't what creates or ensures sleep. See what brings more pressure and what less
I'm not sure if you're reading the comments or not, Alina, but I'll keep posting in hopes you are. I slept a good 9 hours two nights ago (likely exhaustion sleep from the prior night's lack of sleep), but then I had a sleepless night last night. I woke up extremely angry about being stuck in this infinite loop of bad sleep/good sleep/bad sleep/good sleep. It feels never-ending, and I'm at my wit's end. I'm hating this track I'm on and want to get off.
I understand the idea of embracing wakefulness, but it completely sucks to be so isolated and alone in the middle of the night and your brain just won't let go.
I understand your frustration. To me, this is a sign the brain is close to the true surrender when it stops resisting and trying further. When things become too tiring and too confusing... On the other hand, it doesn't mean that we have to sit and tolerate that. What is it that you wish you could do for yourself now? Where is the freedom? You are not forbidden from anything - no wrong emotions, no wrong thoughts. If you don't like this period and can't accept it - fine! You can genuinely allow yourself to not like it! Not pretending tends to bring relief
Sorry if I came across impatient, Alina. That wasn't my intention. I know you're busy and do your best. My panic from yesterday got the best of me.
For me, I honestly felt like staying in bed, tossing and turning but eventually falling asleep, was the right approach to tell my brain it's okay to struggle in bed. But I don't think that's really embracing wakefulness (at least not for me).
It's really true that I'm completely done with this insomnia garbage and all the frustrations that come with it. I just don't want my emotions to get in the way of progress. So I think it's time to shorten my sleep window a bit (moving the alarm up from 6:45 to 6AM) and getting out of bed to watch TV on nights where sleep just isn't coming to me reasonably.
If insomnia is going to continue at this moment in time, I might as well take advantage of it and catch up on some shows I've been meaning to watch.
I feel like I'm on the verge of getting over insomnia, but I can't seem to make regular sleep happen. I'll have a few normal sleep nights in a row then a night like last night, where I go to bed feeling pretty tired (around 11:15pm). But I'm awake until who-knows-when, struggling between tossing and turning and listening to a podcast to bide my time.
At some point last night I finally fell asleep, but I have no idea when that was since I took off my watch to keep from looking at it every hour.
I'm getting to the point where I wonder if it'd be best to NOT continue looking for the same validation and same ideas on letting sleep happen from all you awesome sleep coaches. Maybe I'm stuck in this never-ending insomnia cycle because I continue to read about letting sleep happen on its own--like my brain is on high alert since I'm still reading up on sleep.
Should I simply continue doing what I'm doing? Go to bed each night with no expectations on sleep. And if bad nights happen, let them go and continue on the same track? I'm not sure what else to do.
Hi! I think the answer to the current place of being stuck is here: "I can't seem to make regular sleep happen" - that looks like an attempt to control sleep. Regular sleep is another way the brain wants a "perfect" sleep. We can't make it. It comes when we are okay even with "irregular" sleep.
And definitely, sometimes there can be information overload and if you feel like you need a break from the "sleep world" I think that could do some good! But remember: watching videos or not watching it - isn't what creates or ensures sleep. See what brings more pressure and what less
I'm not sure if you're reading the comments or not, Alina, but I'll keep posting in hopes you are. I slept a good 9 hours two nights ago (likely exhaustion sleep from the prior night's lack of sleep), but then I had a sleepless night last night. I woke up extremely angry about being stuck in this infinite loop of bad sleep/good sleep/bad sleep/good sleep. It feels never-ending, and I'm at my wit's end. I'm hating this track I'm on and want to get off.
I understand the idea of embracing wakefulness, but it completely sucks to be so isolated and alone in the middle of the night and your brain just won't let go.
Not always can I reply in time, but I do my best!
I understand your frustration. To me, this is a sign the brain is close to the true surrender when it stops resisting and trying further. When things become too tiring and too confusing... On the other hand, it doesn't mean that we have to sit and tolerate that. What is it that you wish you could do for yourself now? Where is the freedom? You are not forbidden from anything - no wrong emotions, no wrong thoughts. If you don't like this period and can't accept it - fine! You can genuinely allow yourself to not like it! Not pretending tends to bring relief
Sorry if I came across impatient, Alina. That wasn't my intention. I know you're busy and do your best. My panic from yesterday got the best of me.
For me, I honestly felt like staying in bed, tossing and turning but eventually falling asleep, was the right approach to tell my brain it's okay to struggle in bed. But I don't think that's really embracing wakefulness (at least not for me).
It's really true that I'm completely done with this insomnia garbage and all the frustrations that come with it. I just don't want my emotions to get in the way of progress. So I think it's time to shorten my sleep window a bit (moving the alarm up from 6:45 to 6AM) and getting out of bed to watch TV on nights where sleep just isn't coming to me reasonably.
If insomnia is going to continue at this moment in time, I might as well take advantage of it and catch up on some shows I've been meaning to watch.